Monday, June 4, 2012

FINDING YOUR VALUE

There are times in your life where you need to take inventory.  You need to take inventory on the people in your life, on the things you spend your money on, on what you do with your time, etc.  Sometimes you just need to take inventory on your life, period.

I've been having that feeling lately.  In the past, I'd get the feeling to take inventory about every 2 years.  It usually would happen when I'd feel the need for a change. Most times it was triggered because of my job.  I'd sit and analyze where my life was going.  I'd ask myself, "Is this all there is for me? Where is my life going? What is out there for me?" 

What triggered it for me this time wasn't because I was wanting a new job, but it did come up because of work.  Something happened out of my control that made me question my own value. Let me explain.

For years I've been writing this blog.  It was something that I really wrote for myself and my own release.  Last year, I started reading my blog on HOT 95.7 with The Hot Show every Thursday morning.  I liked doing it because it made me feel recognized and a part of something.

You see, when I first moved here to Houston I was doing morning radio.  Mornings was a way that I felt I could be myself and express myself in radio.  Although, the situation I came into may not have been the best fit for me.  Things changed and I went to mid-days. Which is great! I get to sleep in a little and I still have a great job, but I don't have much of an opportunity to show "Erin."

When I started doing the Thursday blog on HOT, I felt valuable again.  Not only was I being recognized for my thoughts and personality, but I felt valuable because I was needed in another area.  Not only was I the midday girl on KILT but I did a segment on our sister station.  I felt wanted.

Then a couple of weeks ago my segment was cut. Our boss said he thought the segment was "good," but he wanted "great."  Suddenly I knew what it felt like to be an actor and have their character killed off on a show. It's not necessarily because you suck or are bad, but they just want to change things.

Even though I understood, I was still bummed. I started to get that feeling where I evaluate my importance. It may sound weird to some, but I felt that the more things I did, the more valuable I was.  Now I'm back to being a midday girl and am questioning my value and how important I am.  I wonder. Will there be something down the road to make me feel more of an asset? 



They say that when one door closes another one opens, but I just don't know what door can open that will use my talent and make me feel as if I have value and purpose.  I guess you never know what's around the corner or what the universe and God have in store for you.  I'll just keep chugging along and keep doing what I do and hope that it all works out the way it supposed to.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

In the end everyone will die and all but few people with truly grand accomplishments & societal impact, will be forgotten within few generations. So just enjoy the ride in the meantime. Set realistic goals and work hard to achieve them, but don't forget to enjoy your life and have some fun along the way.

Contemporary celebrity worship society makes most people feel as though ordinary life is meaningless, but that's completely untrue. Most people's lives will be just ordinary, but that doesn't mean it's meaningless or without purpose by any means.

Anonymous said...

No offense, but if you are as great on the air as you think you are, why can't you show yourself in 20 seconds? Great radio dj's are able to do that. Most listeners don't want to hear radio dj's talk, even on morning shows. They want to hear music. Most radio dj's have such big egos that they don't get that!

Erin Austin said...

No offense, but it's not the same. Sure I can give a glimpse of the sass or my spunky personality, but it's hard to really relate to people in 20 sec. Not sure if you're an insider or not, but there's a different element that goes into relating on a morning show vs. talking up the intro of a song.

Hence why morning shows are the big dog vs. the rest of the day.

Anonymous said...

The best can relate to people in 20-30 seconds. They can be innovative, interesting, informative and funny. I've listened to KILT and the only person that is able to do this is Zakk United. So, when you are feeling sorry for yourself, just think of all the people like him, who are really talented and can't get full-time jobs, or are off the air.

Anonymous said...

Anon #2, I like the chatter between morning DJ's. Although I'm particular & can't tolerate negativity or prima donna's. And I'm thinking of 2 DJ's in particular when I say this. The station is good music-wise but that's it.

I've listened to stations where the music sucks only because I like the morning show.

Erin Austin said...

We are clearly talking about apples and oranges. There is a definite difference between being semi-relateable in 20 sec and telling a story about going through a divorce and relating to the audience that way.

I am thankful of my job and I'm glad I have it. Although, I'm a person that always wants more and wants to do more and be more. I don't want to settle in any aspect of my life, whether it's job, relationship or me as a person.

Thanks for your comment.

Brad said...

I was wondering what happened to your Thursday blog on 95.7. I thought it was a great & interesting segment that I looked forward too. I find your thoughts very insightful Erin. I wish you the best of luck & will just keep reading your online blog .

Erin Austin said...

Thanks Brad!! I really appreciate that. It's nice to have some positive feedback instead of having someone rip you apart.

Again, Thanks :)

Anonymous said...

I was thouroughly annoyed when you were gone last week, mostly because nothing was said. This week I had to come here hoping to find out what was going on. Thanks you for keeping us in the loop. You will be missed. I am a podcast listener from Portland so I don't get your station. We really miss PK and Ivan up here!

Anonymous said...

It sucks that your segment was cut! I actually look forward to it on Thursdays, when I didn't hear you, and no one even mentioned it..i was annoyed..like wtf? and I had noticed that youu didn't update your blog as well; so I wasn't sure what happened; but I am sorry to hear that your segment was cut; it was a good way to start my Thursdays.

Anonymous said...

I am so in love with you. Seriously!