Monday, September 3, 2012


Do you ever have those moments where you just want to smack yourself upside the head for something you did? I had that moment where I wanted to shake myself like a crying baby for being a bit of an idiot. You're probably wondering what it is that made me have such a lapse in judgement. Actually, it's not something I did...more like something I let myself believe.

I'm not sure exactly how to explain it, but I guess I'm feeling a little bit like a stupid teenage girl.

I've been told I'm cynical. (No kidding right?) Although, lately I've been finding myself becoming a little more gullible. I'm falling in a trap where I'm actually believing something in my head, when it would probably never ever actually happen in the real world.

Here's a scenario that has happened several times and I still somehow fall for it. Say there's a guy that's giving me a little bit of attention. He sends flirty messages, possibly even a sassy text after a few drinks. He seems to be kinda interested yet, no moves are made.

I think most girls would be a little confused. Is he Interested? Does he just want to hookup? Whats going on here?

Well, I had tell myself then and when it still happens I have to remind myself that "You're probably not the only one he does this to so stop thinking you're so special."

Those nights where he's texting you...guess what? He probably sent the same text about snuggling to 3 others girls! You're not so special anymore.

The fact that he never really asks to hang out with you should've been another ginormous clue that "Hey!! The dude isn't really that interested!"

I've heard a saying, 'If he wanted to hang out with you, He would.' And as much as I would love to believe there is a lot of gray area there, I think that if man wants something he goes after it, and if he's not going after you it's probably because he doesn't want you...or at least not bad enough.

So, I just have to shake my head at myself for believing that that guy would ever like or date me. Its like high school Erin all over again. When Adam Stockman would talk to me in the hall and say something I perceived as flirty and thought maybe just maybe that he liked me! When in actuality I had some candy and he wanted a piece! (candy is not a metaphor for something. It's actually candy)

So, the next time I'm getting these cryptic messages that are semi-flirty in nature, somewhat generic, and it goes nowhere because he never does anything about it...I'll have to remind myself a few things. 1. He probably sent the same message to 3 chicks (at least) 2. If he wanted to see you he would. 3. He's probably just messing with you. So get over yourself because you ain't so special!


Cardinalsfan71 said...

So, do you want an opinion from a guys perspective?? If you do, keep reading!! What you are saying here is almost 100% dead-on accurate. If a guy likes you, and likes you a lot, he will make every effort to spend time with you. The late night texts, especially after drinking, are just a way for him to get a little attention because he is feeling lonely. If he cared, he'd be texting you, or better yet, CALLING you during the day asking to see you that night or sometime during the week!!

Call me old fashioned (I'm not really that old, I'm only 40) but a texting only type of relationship is cowardly and shows no personal involvement - it keeps people from becoming attached.

Look for the guy that wants to call you, wants to talk to you, wants to spend time with you. It can become frustrating , I know. It doesn't seem like that person is out there. Trust me, guys have the same thoughts about women that you have about men. A good woman is hard to find - ESPECIALLY in the suburbs!! Keep looking, you may have already met or talked to the right one, you just may not know it yet!!

Have a great day!

Erin Austin said...

I had a feeling. It sucks admitting it to yourself and writing it down that you're just someone in their contact list.

I guess since I don't do that...I was hoping I was more than that.

However, the facts remain. If they wanted to talk, hang out, or be with you...they would.

Even if they're busy they'd make a way to find time.

Since they don't...that's my answer.

Cardinalsfan71 said...

Hang in there - you are a beautiful, intelligent woman. Any man would be lucky to have you in his life - you just need to find the right one!!