Monday, April 4, 2011


I always thought that women were the only ones that did this, but I'm starting to realize that some men date on the social ladder just like women have done for years.

What does dating on the social ladder mean? For women it was always wanting to marry the doctor. The guy that's a mover and shaker. Or dating a celebrity of some sort, whether it's the local celeb, the guy in a band, or the guy that plays some professional sport.

I've always wanted a man that did well for himself, but I don't think I have ever been the girl to seek out someone just because of how high they are on the social food chain.

In fact, I've always had my rule about guys that I wouldn't date. For instance, musicians and professional athletes. As talented and charming as I'm sure they are, I always saw them as guys that were so wrapped up in themselves and weren't really able to stay faithful on the road. Not saying that they're all that way, but I've met a musician that was married and he was giving me a hard core sales job like a used car salesman.

So let's get to how I've noticed guys dating on the social ladder. There's a guy that I semi-dated. For this story we'll call him "Name Dropper." Name dropper was a guy that lived up to his name.

He never really talked about anything of real substance but when he did talk about something, it was usually about himself or the important people he knew. When he would talk about his "good" friends he wouldn't just say, "Oh my friend Jack is going to be there." He'd say, " Oh my friend Jack that plays for the Houston Astros is going to be there." Keep 2 things in mind I've changed the names of the people and teams in this story. Also, the guy he always referenced this way, I'd met multiple times and each time that same guy also acted like he never met me before! NICE!!!

Now what's interesting about this guy is every person he associated with seemed to have a title of some sort. I remember thinking when we were hanging out that if I were some girl with a normal job, like working at a dentist office, he wouldn't have taken me out. What's funny is he's now dating a woman that used to be married to some pro sports player and you can always see her picture in the society section. Needless to say, it sounds like a match made in "who can use who more" heaven.

Now this next story I'm actually kind of embarrassed to admit. You see awhile back I met a celebrity of sorts and kind of developed a school girl crush on him. Ugh...this is where it gets embarrassing.

I actually had thought that this guy might like me!! How silly is that? Why would I ever think this guy would actually like me? Just because he got my phone number and he texted me a little? I think of it right now and I want to closed fist punch myself in the face because I feel so dumb. Where's Antoine Dodson right now?

Even one of girlfriends kind of had to tell me "Erin, I'm sure he was just being nice. He's a celebrity, he doesn't want people to think bad of him."

Unlike the first guy, who I would consider a "social ladder climber, this guy probably isn't seeking to climb the social ladder, but he probably would never go down the ladder.

Let's be honest, guys like him don't like or date girls like me. They don't date "normal" girls. Guys like him are used to dating actresses. Guys like him like/date girls that have 90210 as their zip code. Guys like him date girls that have a team of people to pluck, tweeze, and get them dressed in the morning. Guys like him look at girls like me as an afternoon snack. Guys like him probably just think of me as "that DJ girl down in Houston."

I guess I just feel silly thinking maybe, just maybe. Oy!

I'm not really sure where I wanted to end this and what my conclusion is exactly. I just know in the past guys didn't want to date me because they were afraid I'd talk about them on the radio. Now I find guys that don't think I'm cool enough to date.

I guess I just wish that someone great would find me at the top of their "food chain" (if you will) one of these days.


nick said...

lol this is interesting to read .. ive never really thought of it that way .. when i look at a girl to date its more along the lines of if they have ambition or life goals i dont want a lazy housewife... i work as a heavy equipment operator so .. i dont think i classify high on the "social " food chain lol however my job doesnt really include people ..but definatly theres gotta be something to relate to ...i did date a girl that was getting her phd and she was completely fine with me doing what i like to do and i make enough so its ok ... i like your perspective tho erin ..because you are a dj and u do interact with alllllot of people

Mat said...

Owe Erin,
& you seem a little surprised?!!

That social ladder has many a wrung & the one you reference in your post is mediocre. Where is the exec type hitting on that gorgeous barmaid, & the ignored, well to do house wife, that thinks the valet driver is's all a part of having red blood in your veins & wanting something you may not have or a change.

There's no doubt Hugh Grant gave every mere-mortal male a glimmer of hope in "Notting Hill". There's not one bloke reading this that wouldn't have dinner with Jennifer Aniston or Sandra Bullock only to find it's not all they thought it to be & the little chicka that waits on them at their local is easier to talk to & you have much more in common.

With media & movies these days defining what is 'beautiful' & 'normal' (hmmm?!!)- guys are certainly no different to girls when it comes to dating on the hierarchy ladder.

As BEings we enjoy companionship, the ego derived society we live in recognizes a socialite easier than the girl next door... it doesn't make it better. I've travelled the world & those that touched me the most had nothing to give. Some time spent enjoying the company of yourself, a journey to the soul, may remove the "social ladder' aspect you reference & before long, Mr Pitt himself may be knockin' at your door for a date!

Have a sensational day & smile- it's contagious!