To a lot of you reading this you're probably thinking "Uhhh Yeah...DUH!!" And I'm sure a lot do. Although, if you were to talk to my ex husband while we were married he would've preferred to clean the house with a swiffer mop than get frisky with me.
When I got married I didn't have a lot of dating experience and now that I'm divorced and have been for 5 years, I'm starting to experience the dating thing a little later than most. And let me tell ya this blows!!!
It's not often that I meet someone that I find interesting, but when I do there's a little voice that goes off in my head every time.
You see, my parents are conservative Christians that wanted to make sure I wasn't going to have sex till I was married. So to make sure that didn't happen, they wouldn't allow me to date till I was 16. That included school dances. Now, lucky for them they never had to worry about that because the only guys that ever liked me in high school were either the foreign exchange students or pot smokers. (I was nice to everyone) Oh and top it off I was a late bloomer physically, so that certainly didn't help. Although the most popular girl in school was pretty flat and it always worked out for her. Hmmm.
Back on track here...One thing that my dad told me growing up was, "Erin, guys only want you for one thing. Guys only want to have sex with you." So now every time I meet someone I hear that in my head. And the more men I meet I start to wonder if that's true.
No matter whom I meet or how I meet them. I feel like that men want that one thing and that's it. Now matter if it's "Banker Boy" in Milwaukee that I dated, to the musician that called me his girlfriend for the night, to the guys on match I've met. It's all the same. They all end up the same. Just like my dad told me. Which is sad. I was hoping he might be wrong. Well he was wrong with my ex-husband. There’s a guy that didn't want just sex...he just didn't want it at all.
Like "Banker Boy" In Milwaukee. He was all about me and then one day I could tell things were off, I confronted him and we broke up. After that I could pretty much guarantee that any time he was drunk and it was past 1am, I'd hear from him. A lot of times when he had a girlfriend out of state.
Or the musician that said all the right things at the time. When the last time I saw him, he told me about how he missed having a girlfriend on the road. How he got lonely, and how I was his girlfriend for the night! Now looking back I feel like he saw me coming! Or maybe I looked like easy prey.
Or how about the guys I've met on match, or at the bar. God there’s a few of those.
No matter where I've met them, I feel like they all want one thing. The treasured surprise inside. Am I ever going to find a guy that wants that, but wants me more? IS that even possible?
I know I have a sassy personality that can hang with the guys and can talk about everything. I guess it'd be nice if guys didn't think that I was some dirty pirate hooker just because I can talk about a penis! Yeah I'll talk about penis, but guess what? Doesn't mean I want to see yours!!! And just because I am comfortable to tell a dick joke doesn't mean I pass out free samples like I'm a fricking Costco on a Saturday afternoon!
I wonder if guys do this too!!