I suppose it sounds weird having a list of prayers, but to be honest there are some things in my life in more than one area that need some TLC from the man upstairs.
1. I need a miracle in my finances. I've never had a ton of money in the bank, nor have I ever really been in debt. So for the lack of debt I'm thankful. Right now I'm barely scrapping by. The holidays are always the toughest for me and I've never caught up.
When I moved here to Houston I was in a decent spot financially, I guess. I had a little money in savings. But when I took this job I was also taking a HUGE pay cut. It's over a 35% pay cut. As much as it hurt, I took this job thinking that this move would be a great step for me in the long run. You know, Sometimes you need to take a few steps back before you can move forward.
The only problem is my expenses became more once I moved here. My rent is $400 more than it was in Milwaukee and some other things are more expensive as well.
My small savings I once had is now completely gone. I'm so sick over it. Really, my body is ill over it. I live in a town where everyone is driving around in fancy cars; they work in oil and gas and have tons of money, while I'm struggling to get my electricity paid on time.
I wish I could tell you that I have a fancy shopping habit, but I don't. I haven't been shopping since Christmas. Sure, maybe a trip to Ross and buy a dress for $5.99 and one for $12.99, but that's about it. No $100+ shopping sprees.
I NEED A MIRACLE! If I lost my job tomorrow I just might be a person that lived in my car. That's a super scary thought to think. Brings me back to my childhood a bit.
2. Someday, I hope that GOD will bring me a great man.
I know you're probably surprised that it's not number 1. But let's be honest, I've been hoping for that for a long time and it hasn't happened yet. So why bother.
I was talking to a girlfriend and she was single forever. In fact, she's never really had a boyfriend until just a year ago. I asked her how she felt about all this time without dates. She said, "I had to just come to the terms that it just may never happen”. Maybe she's right. And as cheesy as this may sound, there are many beautiful flowers in a meadow that never get picked. Maybe I'm that flower.
3. That everything will all work out.
I know I have a lot of things to be thankful for. I have so many cool opportunities that happen because of work that so many people would love to experience. I know that I am so lucky to have a job in a career that I love (as uncertain as that is right now). I know that I have a great bill of health and I'm pretty physically fit. That, I am also thankful for.
I guess I'm just looking for that rainbow and heck; I'd love to have the pot of gold at end of it too. A blessing beyond one could imagine. A sign from GOD as to why I'm here...and what's my purpose.
Just a little sign of things being more than ok.