Wednesday, July 22, 2009


I was watching an episode of Law and Order when actor Jeff Goldblum made the comment on the show, "My Mom always told me, Rejection is God's form of Protection." I stood there for a moment and just let that soak in. It got me thinking about the times in my life where I might've felt rejected and how it really turned out for the better after.

I think of relationships that've failed and how I was crushed at the time and sometimes I'm still a little hurt over it. I know deep down it's for the best but it still hurts.

Like when I got divorced. Even though I asked for it, I still felt rejected because my ex husband didn't even try to make it work. I felt rejected both physically and mentally from him. Now, we're divorced and he's getting remarried...and I'm doing my thing but, deep down I know that I would not be happy if I were still married to him.

I needed to feel loved and appreciated. I wanted to feel like I was an equal when really I was made to feel all his business dealing and things he had going on were more important than what I had to say or do. I do believe people can change. But after being divorced for 3 years he still treats me the same. Unimportant.

How about moving here to Milwaukee and dating someone here. I was into him. I had so much fun with him. But, apparently I required more attention then what they wanted to give. So we broke up and he started dating someone 2 states away. Was she prettier? NO! Was she funnier? NO! Did she have a better personality? NO! Was she better than me in the getting it on dept.? DEFINITELY NO!!! I know that for a fact. She is convenient. My feelings still are a little hurt when I happen to see them and I look at her and think "Really? You broke up with me so you could hang out with a girl that SUCKS!?" "Wow it just isn't fair."

Although, if we still dated, I can see myself unhappy because I still wouldn't get the attention that I deserve. I don't want to come in line behind work, his working out, his friends, his trips off with the boys and his drinking out on the weekends. I would like to be a little higher on the totem pole and I 'd like for him to make me feel important and wanted. The rejection saved me from being unappreciated in the long run.

I know rejection is a form of protection when it comes to jobs too. After "The Mathew Blades in the Morning" Show went away, I felt unwanted. I was not wanted on the air on the new station and was told that wasn't going to happen either. At first I was a little bothered but, after awhile I realized that this was a blessing. Here's why...because I wouldn't be happy doing that kind of show. Just announcing..."That was George's Pink!" I would be so uninspired.

About that time they gave me permission to look for another job. Again, I could've been offended that they didn't want to keep me around but instead I started hitting the pavement so to speak, and started sending out my aircheck. Randomly emailing program directors at stations that I would like to work at. Then one day I sent out my package and 3 days later I got a call...from HOUSTON, TX!!!! Now if the rejection that I experienced never happened...the biggest job of my career may never have happened.

Another rejection moment is when I auditioned for Cousin's Subs. They were looking for a spokesperson to go around Wisconsin and find people to enter the Mooing contest for the State Fair. Which required you to travel around Wisconsin, Friday's and Saturday's for 3 months. I thought I was would perfect for the gig.

I get to the interview and I wasn't really prepared. I was all dressed from TV that day. I had on tons of makeup on. Then when it came time to audition, I personally feel I stunk. Needless to say I didn't get the job. At first I was really disappointed but after a month or so I realized, that if I would've got that little gig, I wouldn't be able to fly down to Houston for my interviews and audition for that job, because all my weekends would be all tied up with MOOING.

So now I really believe when I get rejected, there's a good reason or it. I just may not know what that reason is for awhile.


Anonymous said...

Maybe your ex has finally found someone that he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Maybe you are just jealous that he dumped you. When you keep talking about them a year-maybe longer after you two dated,it really just comes off as jealousy and quite pathetic to be honest. I hope that you leaving the state and going elsewhere will lead you to a happier place in life where there is no need to complain and cry about the fact that you cannot find anyone to date-or that nobody wants to date you. Good luck!!!

Erin Austin said...

What ex are we talking about? If you're talking about the ex here in Milwaukee....HAHAHAHAHA....THE REST OF HIS LIFE WITH HER!?! That honestly is one of the funniest things I've heard EVER!

If you only knew.

As for as the ex husband goes...Well best of luck.

To be honest...I'm not jealous of these girls at all. I really don't understand why Mr. Ex would continue to date her. His friends are not big fans...I hear his parents aren't big fans...nothing is really that glowing about her other than she has 4 year college educucation.

For me it's NOT's a matter of REALLY? THAT?

But to each his own.