I had an interesting encounter just the other day with a girl that is 21. The whole situation made me so glad that I'm older, and not 21 anymore.
It all started the other night at Taylor's when friends of my ex boyfriend walked in. I hadn't seen them in awhile so we were talking a bit and I mentioned how I was just telling my girlfriends about how I used to into my ex boyfriend all the time but now I never see him. They said, "Well...you what's really funny is that he's here right now in the back corner." His girlfriend said, "Hey lets go over there and you can surprise him."
So I walk over there with them...and a little nervous too. I hadn't really seen him in awhile. He looks up and I said, "HIII!" with my little awkward wave I do. I'm not sure what he thought when he saw me because I think he was drunk. So I walk over to his BFF and say Hi. We talk for a second then I turn around and start talking to my ex. While I'm talking to him his 21 year old girlfriend who was sitting with her friends get up from her table and goes and stands next to him. Like I can't tell the girl is trying to mark her territory and basically pee on me.
Just then the friends girlfriend I walk over with says "Erin maybe you should get out of here." I thought good idea. But I was so bothered my ex's GF acting insecure that as I left I said something like..."you don't have to worry I'm moving anyway." Just then the girl screams out at the top of her lungs..."GO F$^& YOURSELF!!!" I make some comment back...and then she yells it again..."GO F_#^% YOURSELF!!!! CLASSY.
Now granted I did make a comment to her that could be deemed as a snotty comment but give me a break. Can't your boyfriend talk to a girl with out you walking over and clinging to him? Trust me, nothing is going to happen. Trust me, THAT SHIP HAS SAILED. So someone needs to calm the F$^& DOWN! When you cling onto you boyfriend...it comes off as EXTREMELY INSECURE and IMMATURE! That's a behaviour I don't tolerate.
After that, I then see the 2 of them arguing outside. She was on the street corner screaming at him(for some reason) and then started pushing and hitting him!! Really?? Because your boyfriend had a VERY brief conversation with his ex-girlfriend?
Some how he gets her to calm down and I see them walk back inside. A few minutes later one of the guy friends walks over to see if I'm OK. I said I'm fine but I don't want the other guy friends to hate me. He said it was all good and walked back to his area. Then some of their girlfriends walk over and my ex is with them. The girls asked if I was ok. Then my ex said.."let's do some shots." Now keep in mind. His GF just got done acting crazy on him outside and screamed at me. The entire time I'm thinking "What in the world is going on right now and is your GF going to come over here and start something?" He doesn't mention anything that just happened...he just takes his shot and goes back to his area.
Now here's the best part. About 10-15 minutes goes by and now his GF comes over and starts talking to the girls. And I can see her staring at me. Is she scoping me out? Sizing me up? Trying to stare me down? Does she even have a clue? As I'm talking to one of the other girls I can see her starring at me out of the corner of my eye. I look up and she looks at me and says.."Hi, I'm (fill in the blanks) girlfriend." I look at her probably with a face that says (you're an idiot) and respond with "Ahhh...Yeah...I know!"
I mean REALLY!!! What are you doing? Are you again...trying to mark your territory? Do you have amnesia and forget that you just went bi-polar on me? I certainly don't think it was a visit to make a truce...so what was the point?
After that night, it got me thinking and hoping that I pray to sweet baby Jesus that I didn't like that when I was 21. I can remember a time where I acted insecure when I dated my ex-husband. I was young and my ex and I lived 100 miles apart. I was also a virgin when I met my ex so I made him wait a long time to you know. Well I worked with guys that knew my situation and told me "Hey if you're not giving it up...he's getting it from somewhere." I'm 20 at the time and I believed them. I would get especially worried when he would hang out with guys from work that frequented strip clubs!!
Needless to say I would get a little paranoid. After awhile though, I grew out it and he stopped doing that. I just don't ever remember being so territorial and insecure.
I'm sure this is a phase that she will out grow(we hope). She'll look back in a few years after they both move on and she'll wonder why did I ever act like that or why did even care?
I can tell you, I've learned a lot of the years...and I'm still learning but I'm glad I'm not 21.