Wednesday, January 7, 2009

I NEED TO DEFEND MYSELF

I’m writing this blog because I feel the need to defend myself. Over the last year people have made good and bad comments about ME and MY BLOG. Some people have praised me for what I write while others call me names, make fun of me, and judge me. If you notice on my profile to this blog I label myself as a girl that wears her heart on her sleeve. I talk about things that bother or upset me, that’s just how I am. If I’m hurt I need to tell someone about it, it makes me feel better. I am a good girl.

One of the biggest issues of me having this blog is that men seemed to be bothered by it. Almost as if they think that if I have a bad time with them that I’ll write about them. This is simply untrue. There are many instances where I either had a bad date or a lack luster encounter and I’ve never mentioned anything. I’ve actually had several guys that were interested in me warned by their friends to “Watch out for her!” Really? ME? They act as though I’m some Man-eater, chewing guys up and spitting them out. Or they act like I’m some player that always is on the prowl for a guy. UNBELIEVABLE! I’m like any other girl. I just want to find a great guy that loves me for me and treats me the way I’ve always wanted to be treated. I can’t help that my experience with men in the town of Milwaukee has been less than pleasurable.

When guys I start to date ask me about my blog and what it’s all about, I have one warning for them…”Don’t treat me like crap and I won’t talk about you!” Funny thing is the 3 guys I’ve had to tell that to I’ve written about all of them…Gee I wonder why they were so scared. Probably because they know they were shady mother scratchers! When things would go south and I’d write about them and of course their friends would check it out. I always kept their identity concealed but, the friends always knew who I was talking about. Listen, I can’t help that your friends read my blog and that they know the crappy things you pulled. That’s not my problem. Like I said, “Don’t treat me like crap and I won’t talk about you and the stuff you did.”

As for people sending out the warning flare for their friends, you really don’t know me. Yeah I said, just like they do on the Jerry Springer Show…”YOU DON’T KNOW ME!! DON’T JUDGE ME!” I know that having stuff written about you is maybe a little scary but, my thought is, if you have nothing to hide than you have nothing to worry about. Every person that I’ve written about in a less than perfect light has acted just the way I’ve described. I don’t lie about these situations. My group of girlfriends can absolutely verify…most of the time they were there.

What I’m afraid of is that I won’t find a guy because of this blog but, my friend Mathew said to me, “Erin those guys just aren’t the ones for you that’s all.” I hope he’s right. Although, when I end up moving to another city maybe things will be a little different. Milwaukee is a small town. There’s about 2 degrees of separation between you and the person next to you.

7 comments:

Chris said...

Erin,

I'm so glad to hear you stand up for yourself because I feel that you do get crap for speaking your heart and your mind. I admire you for what you do with your blog. If we, as people can't find ways to express our emotions and share with others, what good is the ability to have emotions and to think and feel and be free.

Now, regarding the guys you date. If they are so worried about what you may or may not say, I will agree with you friend that they are not for you. If the person you choose to date is worried about what you will say, they are simply not secure enough with themselves to handle any type of criticism. As part of any relationship, you have to be open to some criticism because frankly, no one is perfect and something is always going to rub someone the wrong way. It's how we deal with it in relationships that makes them exciting.

I hope that the bad experiences you have faced don't taint your opinion of Milwaukee, especially the guys. Not all of us are bad, however the goods ones seems to stay quiet for far too long. Good luck with everything you are facing and I'm sure good things are in store for you.

Anonymous said...

You shouldn't have to defend yourself, I think the men you dated are scared you’re going to say they suck in bed or have a small penis. You have the right to be happy there are some good men out there, so don't be discouraged some of us are just shy and intimidated by a beautiful woman. :)

Erin Austin said...

I'm sure some might be scared of that...but I would never do that!

Although, some have hurt my feelings pretty good that the thought did cross my mind for a second. It was fun at least to think about!! HEHE

Anonymous said...

I'm not siding against you but think about this... How would you feel about a guy who had a blog about the girls he was dating? Would you be happy about it or a bit apprehensive? Give it some thought...how would you feel if roles were reversed?

David said...

Erin,

I'm Glad to hear you're doin OK.
But also Sad to hear that Lake FM has chosen not to put you back on the air. The on air chemistry between you, Mathew, and AJ was awesome and I think that the station is shooting themselves in the foot by breaking it up.

If you do end up leaving Milwaukee, know that you will be missed.

I met you once, at the Harry Potter preview. And from what I could tell you seemed like a well rounded, down to earth Lady, so don't feel like you need to defend yourself.

Dave

Erin Austin said...

Anonymous,

I get what you're saying if roles were reversed but let me tell you my thoughts on what a guys blog would include about the girls he dates.

HE MIGHT TALK ABOUT

1. her "banging body"
2. how he dumped her because fireworks didn't go off behind her after they met.
3. How she was in bed.
4. How he doesn't understand why girls just can't have a good time.
5. Why girls are such drama...even though he's got 3 at 1 time

I could go on. Like I've said before IF YOU DON'T TREAT ME BAD I WON'T TALK BAD ABOUT YOU!

Most of what I write about is something taht has troubled me or my friends and I use MY past references to talk about it.

The person that has been talked about a lot in the recent months on this blog has done some very bad things, and said or did very disrespectful things towards me. Things that I work on to forgive and forget.

Erin Austin said...

Let me follow by saying YES I know ALL MEN AREN'T DOGS!!

The guys I've met here I think all have great qualities and might be good people deep down...but...the behavior that they displayed towards me at the time is well disappointing to say the least.

Maybe someday they'll change the bad behavior...cross your fingers