Thursday, March 6, 2008

IT'S O.K. TO BE SINGLE...RIGHT?

I'm not going to lie but, I'm a girl that likes being in a relationship. Now, I don't want to be in one just for the sake of being in a relationship. That would be stupid...and I would be settling. And I will be damned if I settle in any sense of the word. I want to be in a good relationship.

I mean, I know plenty of girls and guys for that matter, that before they are even out of the relationship they're in, they already have one waiting in the wings. Not my style.

I have been comparing myself to others lately. Which is not good and I shouldn't do it but, whatever. So, I was thinking about some of my exes or people I've dated here and there and I realized all of them are dating someone or at the least have the "steady" girls that they keep around just in case they need something...if you know what I mean. I had this thought like "Is there something wrong with me that I can't find anyone?" Now, I could've thought of it this way..."Maybe they have lower standards than me...maybe they're settling...maybe they're not really happy." But, I of course think..."why can't I find anyone?" or "Why can't I just keep someone around?". Yep, can't do that...again not my style.


I actually had dinner with one of my guy friends the other night. We were talking about dating and other relationship stuff. He asked me what it was that I wanted. I told him eventually I'd like to find somebody. He asked me why I wanted to be in a relationship so bad...I told him "It's like the Wii at Christmas time...you don't want to the only kid on the block without one." He laughed, and I know my answer seems silly, but everytime I turn around, everyone has got someone except for me ...or so it seems. I know that with the great set of girlfriends that I have we're all completely single. Sometimes we have dates but more often than not..we don't. As I like to say "We are as dry as the Sahara." And no...I'm not having a pity party..I swear.

I guess it really hit me when I came the realization that my exes had somebody serious or not so serious. I thought "how did they find someone so quickly?" I know that I'm picky and wondered are they being picky or they just filling with a "good for now girl?" Now don't get me wrong, I would so much rather be single and playing the field(even though I'm not) than be in a relationship that I'm in just to fill time. LAME! If I need something that bad...there's always the store "A Woman's Touch" that I can check out. Maybe this experience of having no dates and nobody in my life is just different for and I'm not used to it. Like I've said before, most of my 20's were in relationships. I really do think it's a good idea to be by myself for awhile. It's not always easy but I think it's good for me.

Well I will close with this. My exes may have somebody. They maybe happy and they may not be. I know that even though I am the girl that likes to have someone, I won't let it get me down that I don't have someone. There's one thing I know. That along the path of dating you might make some wrong turns but, I know I won't stay down the bad road very long. Here's one more nugget, I heard someone say this "I'll start dating someone when they fascinate me as much as my job." Let's take that one step further... "I'll start dating when someone fascinates me more than my job, and for that matter fascinates me more than my dog."

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Erin-

SO I have a question, after reading your blogs and wondering do you know what you really want from someone? Some days you seem to be accross the board in what you want and what you will take.

And with that what does someone have to do to get you to notice them? I understand sending you a (one) shoe in a box doesn't work:), but what catches your eye? The reason I ask is because you seem particular to what you like and not everything is that way on the surface, looking at the full picture might be better.

I wish you the best

Ed

Anonymous said...

kudos to you erin. don't worry, there are plenty of other single, fabulous women out there waiting for the right one. you are not alone. take heart...and NEVER settle!

sue said...

Erin,
Being single can be frustrating when you have friends/people you know in relationships, including ex-boyfriends but don't focus on them focus on you. Don't focus on the past, focus only on the present. Friends tell me, don't look for love, when you least expect it, it will find you. In the meantime, I sell Passion Party products, if there's anything you need (if you know what I mean)