This is kind of complex thought...but let's give it a try. And this whole idea popped in my head because I was talking with...a guy...and he was talking about his plans for the future. He basically had the next year and half of his life planned out. He was doing big things with his career, then he was going to travel, and then come back get married and have a bunch of babies. Well, he's not having the babies obviously it's whomever he settles down with.
That entire conversation got me thinking. When it comes to relationships and marrying do we really find the right one or do they just come at the right time?
I know for me, when I was younger I had mapped out my life somewhat. Not to the point of that what age I would get married and have kids but, I definitely had goals of what age I wanted to accomplish college, careers steps and that sort of thing. I'm not in the norm for most women. I could be wrong but, I think a lot of women have this age in their head that need to get married by and have kids by and if that doesn't happen, they go into panic mode.
Guys are different. I think a guy would let the woman of his dreams slip away because he would rather spend time meeting his "sales goal for the year". Or they would rather climb the corporate ladder til they feel fulfilled and then...look for a girl of his dreams. Once that happens, he goes into panic mode and settles for the next best thing around. Women are different, I think that a woman no matter where she is in her life, if she finds the right guy, she'll juggle him with the career and make it work.
I can think of so many men that make me think this way. CAREER THEN RELATIONSHIP!
I think I fell victim to this line of thinking. I think Sean did this in a way. Although, I'm sure there was something else I just never was aware of. When we broke up, to me it wasn't because we weren't compatible. Sure neither of us were perfect but I thought we were pretty good as a couple. I think we both learned things from each other. I think part of the reason we broke up was because of our careers. I know that when we dated I took a back seat to a lot. He had one major priority which was his brother.(which I completely understand) His other priority was work. I think he thought of me sometimes as an after thought. Like I think most men do. WORK WORK WORK then..."Oh Yeah, I have a girlfriend maybe I should call her."
Now Sean had an itch for a career change and then I got this job in Milwaukee out of nowhere. Til then, I had actually been looking to get jobs in Texas to be near him. He got a job and he wasn't going anywhere and we weren't any closer to being together. When it boiled down to it...careers were more important. I guess maybe for both of us.
So, when do you stop planning out your life and start letting it just happen? If more people just let their heart speak a little, would there be less divorce because then we might find our true match vs. someone that came around when you thought you were ready for them?
Does this even make any sense or am I the only one that feels this way?