How many times have we done that ladies??? LET'S BE SERIOUS!!! I know I've done this on numerous occasions!!! My last boyfriend was emotionally unavailable...my ex-husband...guys that I've met, dated, you name it!!!
Funny thing is, in some of these cases(at least for me) the guys BECAME emotionally unavailable. Things would start off great and then either something would happen out of our control or things would simply fizzle out.
Then it comes to casually dating. I have a question...if you're an emotionally unavailable man why do you insist and persist to pursue women? Whatever the excuse is. 'I need to get my S@&T figured out' or 'I'm going to quit my job and do other things so I can't have a girlfriend.' So if you're not ready to be in a relationship with anyone..why pursue anything at all? I DON'T GET IT!!!!
Maybe for guys they don't see anything wrong with it. To them they're doing the typical guy thing. Getting girls and dealing with the repercussions later...if any.
I know it may seem like lately I talk about this stuff a lot but yesterday when a good girlfriend of mine sent an email to me citing stuff about women and our attraction to these types of men I thought "GOD how many times have I done that?"
I was just reading an article online about why do we have this attraction. I found something very interesting...they asked the question (Are you afraid someone will get to know you and reject you?) I read that and I thought "maybe that's my problem." I like being in a good relationship but lately when it comes to dating I have this fear that for some reason I may not be good enough.
I've actually been trying to deal with this one for awhile now. It all started after my divorce. Even though I was the one who pursued separation and divorce, I did so because of his inaction. He didn't try to keep me or make me happy. We went to counseling and I told him that he was obsessed with work. He never even tried to change or make things better. That hurt. Instead of thinking "Oh I'm better off", (which I did from time to time) I usually took it personal and wondered why he never tried..."What's wrong with me?"
Now I know there's nothing REALLY wrong with me but I have this great group of girls that I hang out with. We're all good girls, with different personalities. One of us is maybe a little more shy, one maybe a little more reserved and other 2 are weird and wacky. Yet, none of us are dating anyone...we are as dry as the Sahara right now.
Don't we all deserve to have someone say "I can't believe I'm with (insert your name here). I know I do. Will I ever find them? Not sure. I just hope that one day I do find that guy that will say that...until then I'll do my best to avoid unhealthy people and relationships. Which may be harder than it seems considering we all get a little lonely at times.