Monday, May 9, 2016


Years ago, I put together a list of all the things that I wanted in my future husband.   I wrote the list after meeting Melissa Malueg, a life coach, who was a regular guest on the morning show I was a part of in Milwaukee.  She said that if I spend time on my list that I will start attracting those people to me.  She also said that everything on the list had to be positive.  So, instead of saying, doesn't have a drinking problem, you'd say, can control his alcohol or lives a healthy lifestyle.

After my most recent break-up, I decided to re-work my list to highlight the things that are especially important to me.  I'll print out my new list and keep it to remind me of what I'm looking for when I start going out on dates.  So, let's get started.

Career minded
Hard working
Has a good work ethic
Financially responsible
Well educated
Is a good person
Willing to solve an argument
Kind hearted
Treats others how they'd want to be treated
Is a good kisser
Respects me and other people
Thinks about other people's feelings
Takes my feelings into consideration
Nice striking features
Good dresser
Has good hygiene
Is affectionate
Is in good shape
Is able to apologize
Will compliment me
Good in bed
Has a positive attitude
Likes to take getaways
Lives a healthy lifestyle
Drinks in moderation
Stays active
Enjoys red wine
Likes sushi/fish
Someone that thinks I'm funny
Has a great sense of humor
Can make me laugh
Can act silly if need be
Enjoys staying fit

Can appreciate my career
Is understanding of my job and what it entails
Is able to work with my hours
Attractive to me
Is willing and able to spend time with me
Willing to share his feelings
Has a good set of friends
Can cook a bit
Enjoys good food
Is an honest person
Is open
Has a great family
Someone that enjoys and is a good cuddler
Someone who can be my best friend
Someone that I can be myself around
Someone that can be themselves around me
Has a good self esteem
Someone that would adore that snot out me
Someone to accept my differences with theirs
Someone who really loves dogs
Enjoys the occasional nap on the weekends
Enjoys occasionally sleeping in.
Has a tender touch 
Has some sort of faith
Is thoughtful
Likes to surprise me
Wants to include me in his life
Willing to accept my good with my bad
Enjoys trying new things 
Is adventurous

For all my single friends, I suggest that you come up with your own list of things that are important to you.   Print it out and post it somewhere, whether it's your desk at work, or it's your refrigerator at home.  Keep it where you can see it.


Becky Motew said...

Great travel piece, Erin! I have read your blog off and on for years. Keep it up!

Becky Motew said...

Great travel piece, Erin! I have read your blog off and on for years.

couple doin it different said...

I looked up your blog from a result of fealing like an island. I really hear you. I understand the longing of finding s soul mate. Your list is really good.......until you get to the faithful part. Now hear me out, I am a married guy (50) and emotionally very monogamous. Im also very spiritual and creative. But in affairs of the heart I have found being realistic is wisw. Marraige in its current form is a disaster. The statistics beat that out. People are just not very good at being completely sexually monogamous. Its the simple truth. Sex with the same person and no one else for 40 plus years? Really? Statistics are not a tell all, but divorce and affair rates bear this out. Unreasonable expectations of denial of sexual beings in long term relationships and marraiges bear this out. We will never meet, you seem like a nice person. I have no axe to grind. I simply wish to say that maybe you should think about a monogamish relationship and the benefits it brings. Emotional stability, commitment WITH freedom. All good things.