Friday, April 13, 2012

DO I FREAK GUYS OUT?

I've always described myself as "an acquired taste," but I never thought I was that much of an "acquired taste" till just recently.

In the two and a half years of living here in Houston my dating life has been on life support. Part of the reason is because I've been pretty burnt out on dating, but when I do have enough cajones to date I think I freak guys out.

I've always thought that guys deep down want a girl that craps out rainbows, never swears, and acts like the damsel in distress. All of which are things that I don't act like. I say what's on on my mind, cuss like a sailor, and have no problem doing things without your help.

A few weeks ago I had a couple first dates and one of those dates I can say I could tell that he couldn't wait until he was out of there.

I will say I was pretty much myself. Granted, I didn't sit there and tell him penis jokes or anything, but I was very comfortable on being my authentic self.

I'm not sure at what point I freaked the guy out. All I know is at the end of the date it couldn't have been more clear to me that I was NOT getting a call for a second date.

"Wait Erin, how could you tell?" Well, let me tell ya! The first hint was the "side hug" that he gave me when we were saying goodbyes. A guy that gives you a side hug never wants to go out with you ever again.

My next clue was when we were walking towards our cars he was 10 feet in front of me already at his car waving goodbye and I wasn't even close to my car. Yeah, take a minute and visualize how that went down. It's another massive clue that he is never going to call me again!

As I replay parts of that night back in my mind I can't think of why I'd freak him out exactly. I know that I was a bit chatty, but that's who I am. However, I thought I was pretty good at asking questions.

I know my job and blog freak guys out. Although he seemed rather interested in my job. So not sure what freaked him out. It could've been that or a combination of anything.

All I know is that after dates like that I overanalyze everything I do and did, then convince myself that it must be something about me that is keeps these guys running to their cars after our date.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

"I LOVE YOU" 3 WORDS THAT CAN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS

This may come off as weird, but hear me out. The 3 words "I love you" are very powerful words. They are 3 little words that most women crave to hear. They are 3 words that make or break a relationship. In my opinion, they break the relationship as soon as they are uttered from one's lips.



In the early stages of a relationship "I love you" has yet to be said. At some point one or the other person is going to say it. For instance, if the girl says it first and the guy doesn't say it back, things in that relationship are never the same. Even if he says it back because he feels he has to, the guy looks at that relationship in a whole new light. He'll probably become distant and start back off.

Then there's the guy that says it first. He's the guy that says it first and then never says it again. You become the girl that now always says it first only to hear him say "I love you too." (Listen you idiot! I'm tired of saying it first...so maybe just maybe...you can say it sometime...and say it first!)

Then you have the guy that says "I love you," but says it all the time. And says it like it's the period on the end of his sentence. For instance, here's a conversation that I had once with my ex. Him: "What are we having for dinner?" Me: I don't know. What do you think about chicken marsala?" Him: "Yeah that sounds good. OK, Love you." (click) Gee, not feeling the love on that one. Nope, not at all.



When someone says "I love you" all the time and then never does anything or says anything else to show you that they love you, when they do say it at the end of a sentence it makes those 3 little words become rather meaningless.

I'm not saying that people shouldn't say "I love you." I wish I had someone saying that to me. What I am saying is, is that those 3 little words change the dynamic of the relationship. They change it for better or worse. And when it changes it for the better, you have to pay extra attention that you don't take it for granted.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

IS DOUCHEY THE NEW NORMAL?

Many times when my friends and I get together and talk about dating horror stories the phrase "Where are the normal guys?" is uttered. I'm starting to believe that the weirdos and douche bags we're finding are the new normal.



You may wonder "How many different kinds of douche bags are there?" The stereotypical douche bag is the guy you'd find on Washington Ave. He's freshly spray tanned and is wearing either a tight shirt with wings on it or some v-neck 2 sizes too small. Oh, let's not forget about his Louie or Gucci belt. Then there's the guys that just behave like douche bags. Whether it's boning lots of chicks or sending girls pics of their wang.

Let's talk about the second dude for a moment. I know we've talked about people sending naked pics before, but this is just about the guys that do it. I thought that this was abnormal behavior, but now I'm starting to think that so many guys do it and it's the new normal.

For instance, I had never received a wang picture until about about 6 months ago. It was from a guy I "dated" in Milwaukee and hadn't spoke to in almost a year. Then, bam there's and picture of his wang. It happened to me a couple of months ago with another guy I "dated."



A friend of mine is on match.com and 3 out of the 5 guys that she's talked with (keep in mind, she didn't even go on dates with these dudes) have sent her pictures of their wang and one even sent a video of him playing with themselves. WTF? Is this the new normal? Does everyone send masturbating videos?

When I was at the hair salon today, my stylist was telling me that she has a client who is 65 and on match.com. This lady is a grandma and men that are her age are sending pics of their wang. Frickin EWWWW. Who wants a pic of a 65 + yr old penis?

OK OK enough with the winky pic talk. Douchey behavior goes beyond that. It's dating 4 chicks at once. It's cheating. It's any man behaving badly action. The question is, are there so many men behaving badly that it's become the new normal? Are the guys that once "normal" so out numbered that instead of saying I want a "normal" guy I need to start saying I want a "weird" guy?

Where did all the normal guys go? Are there no normal guys anymore?