Thursday, May 26, 2011

DO GUYS EVER FEEL BAD ABOUT THE DICK MOVES THEY PULL?

Every girl has had it happen to her. A moment, when a guy she knows, or is in a relationship with, pulls what I call a "DICK MOVE." The "DICK MOVES" vary in degree. It can be anything from not calling the girl again, to standing her up, or even worse...the "ULTIMATE DICK MOVE" dating more than one girl at a time or cheating on her. My question is: Do guys ever feel bad when they look back on those "DICK MOVES" they pulled on girls?

In the last couple of months I personally have experienced some pretty BIG DICK MOVES! Let me see if you think they are, and tell me if you think a guy ever feels bad about it later.






DICK MOVE #1


So there's a guy that I thought was super attractive. Turns out he lives in the neighborhood and we have mutual friends. We exchanged numbers and he texts me one day asking "So when are we getting together?" So I said, "What about Thursday?" He then asks "Where?" Now, the first thing I was thinking is this guy is making me do all the work! Uhh LAME.

So I suggest that we do happy hour for sushi. There was a place I wanted to try and he was all about it. So, Happy Hour it is for sushi. The only thing we didn't nail down was a time.

Thursday rolls around and it's thundering like a mutha! I haven't heard from him in 2days and part of me was thinking he might bail on me, so I send him a text saying, "I know the weather is crazy, but are we still on for happy hour?"

HIM: Stuck at Work :(
ME: Till?
HIM: 5:30. Rolling to bingo in heights if u wanna join us! My homie is moving into our apts that I'm going with. Roll with us!
Be at my apt at 6:00 Apt 456

Now the first thing that comes in my head is, "WHAT THE FRICK?" We had plans and he forgot and made other plans??? Considering I had a feeling he was going to bail on me my friend Laura and I were coming up with my plan B earlier which happened to be BINGO.


ME: Funny you say that cuz Laura invited me to go
HIM: Cool Y'all roll with us
HIM: Or not. See U there

OK so I guess I'll just meet him there...weird! I call him on the way to see if he was there already or if he needed us to save him a spot. NO ANSWER!

So, Laura and I get there and he's nowhere to be found. We look around the room and nothing. HE NEVER SHOWS AND NEVER CALLS BACK!!! What's even better, is this guy then posts a picture on Facebook of him holding a Sapporo Beer in his hand with a sushi menu on the table!!!! AGAIN...WTF???

The icing on the cake is that he deleted the picture the next morning! Hmmmm!

This guy is the one that wants to get together yet, not only does he ditch out his original plans with me, but then ditches on the 2nd round of plans!! How RUDE!

I think my favourite part of it all was the picture on Facebook. (Note to guys: You're shady...we will find you out!) That and the fact that this guy is supposed to be a good church boy!

Hey Church guy!!!! W.W.J.D???? I don't think Jesus would've stood me up for sushi and then stood me up for bingo!! I think if Jesus didn't really want to hang out with me he wouldn't have asked. And if Jesus had a better offer, Jesus would've called and said that maybe he needs a rain check.

I heard from him 2 days later and all his text said was "Tennis?" Needless to say I was a bit busy, and since then I've never heard from him.

DICK MOVE #2

This kind of goes back to my last blog a bit.

Go on a few dates with dude. Texting all the time. Rumours start that he is trying to pick up other women that I work with. Yet, he's still texting and talking to me. Then all of the sudden NOTHING! POOF! He pulls a Houdini and stops communicating. Next thing I see a few weeks later, Dude is in a relationship! That was fast!!!

Was this guy only trying to get into my pants? Was he with this chick the whole time and kept talking to me 'just in case' old faithful falls through? If this guy really decided that we weren't really a match, why wouldn't he just have enough balls to say, "Hey I think you're a nice girl, but I still have feelings for my ex, no hard feelings. Let's be friends." Or "Hey I think you're funny, but I like chicks with kids! And I want a family yesterday! We're just not a fit." Why not just be honest?? Why be a coward about it? We're all adults.

I just don't understand when men have this lapse in better judgement why don't they seem to ever feel bad. Why don't they apologize for being an idiot and pulling some DICK MOVE? Wouldn't it be better in the long for you to have a clean reputation than have it tarnished with women out there thinking you're a moron??

I would just like to know if guys ever feel bad for doing stupid stuff and making bad decisions.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

ARE DOUCHEBAGS WINNING?




I know that seems like a cheesy Charlie Sheen reference, but it's not. I'm seeing more douchebags having their cake and eating it too. Douchebags that go out and try to have their way with half of the single women in Houston and somehow find a girl that will fall for their B.S. In this blog I will tell you about the douchebags that I've met, dated, or that my friends have dated, and how those guys think that they're winning! When really they aren't.

Let's start with one of my friends' douchebags. This couple dated for about 5 years. They lived together; they had a dog together, and were planning on getting a house together. Then my friends' BF comes back from a work trip and decides that he can't be in a relationship and doesn't give her a reason why other than he needs to be by himself. (Note to women: Anytime a guy says he needs his space...it really means he needs his space inside another woman...just saying)

Now, this douchebag that couldn't be in a relationship has gone off the deep end. Getting drunk all the time and now "dating" a bisexual bartender with a kid! Can you say she sounds like a gem? Wait...so does he! Thing is...he thinks he winning!




Or how about my other girlfriend who was engaged to a guy that had a girl on the side for who knows how long. This guy totally mind f#cked my friend. The poor girl finally saw it for herself and he still tried to deny it! Really? Do you think she's dumb and blind? NO! She's neither. She's one of the nicest, most positive people I've ever met. Love her!

Now let's give you a couple of the douchebags that have crawled my way.

Let me introduce you to "Burrito Boy." A successful business man that has a certain swag about him. He and I went out on 5 or 6 dates when he told me he doesn't date. When I asked what he called this, he started spewing off how he remembers moments and not dates. He remembers the important things and doesn't label them with dates.

This guy also told me that a girl who is in media here in Houston was like his sister. They hung out all the time. Oh...but she's just like his sister to him. In fact, she was supposedly dating his best friend. Or was she???? Turns out, this girl who was like a sister to him, was actually a girl he dated about the same time as me. (Wait, he didn't date me...that's right) So apparently, this guy likes to sleep with girls like his sister!! Awesome! BTW, this guy who claims he doesn't date and couldn't be in a relationship now has a girlfriend. Interesting!



Now let’s, give you the latest and greatest example.

There's a guy here in Houston that I was set up with. He's well known in the community, a very successful business owner, and well connected.

He's been divorced for about a year now, and half that time he's dated someone. They broke up and he was on the prowl. Getting set up with women in every direction. When I met him he came highly recommended but also came with a warning from others. So I treaded cautiously.

He pursued me. He asked me to dinner. He brought me as his date to a charity gala. He even told me that his late father if he were alive would've "loved me!" I thought things were going pretty good. Until I started noticing that he would call and text, but never ask me out. I thought that was strange. Something was a little fishy. I asked a guy friend about it. His response, "sounds like he's f#@king someone else." Hmm...That was my feeling as well.

So, he falls off the face of the planet. I haven't heard from him in about a month now. However, I look on Facebook and see he's back in a relationship with the mother of 2 that he dated for 6 months! Really??? That's interesting timing!! In a month you already have a girlfriend?? I have a feeling that while he's off trying to hook up with half of Houston, this woman was still and always in the picture. In fact, I'd put money on it.

Now this guy acts like he's so great and innocent. I wonder if his girlfriend would like to know that he tried sleeping with several women in my office. I wonder if his girlfriend would appreciate knowing that her "perfect and precious" boyfriend sent me a dirty text just one month ago that read: "I want to kiss u, suck on ur nipples and then eat ur pie!!!"

I could give you a few more examples that are way juicier, but I'll leave it at that!!!! My point has been made.

You know what's funny about this, is that the more that the pieces start coming together it gets more boggling. The fact that this guy was trying get with me and a couple other women I work with. But not only that, as it turns out he was trying to date half the medical staff at some hospital.

Did he realize that he probably cast out too many lines on his fishing expedition for women and decided to go back with what's comfortable? I mean, it obviously worked out the first you tried dating!!!

Maybe if he didn't try to sleep with everyone, he would've found a nice girl. Instead, he thinks he's winning, when really he's settling! Congrats indeed to the "Happy Couple." I hope that she realizes just because a guy has money doesn't mean he'll treat you well.

Don't misconstrue me outing this guy or the others because I want them back or that my friends want them back. We don't. It's that fact that these men think they can have their cake and eat it too. They can do what they want, because there will always be some woman that will date them. A woman that turns a blind eye because she sees dollar $$$$, or because she sees power, or wants the life of seeing her face in the society section.

Monday, May 2, 2011

LADIES...DON'T WASTE THE PRETTY

God knows I worry about more than I should. I let things bother me that shouldn't. I sometimes let people treat me less than I should be treated. I date guys that aren't worth my time. I need to stop it and stop wasting the pretty.

Most women have heard of the book "He's Just Not That Into You." Most of us ladies have also seen the movie multiple times. In the book the author, Greg Behrendt, uses a phrase that I think all of ladies need to repeat to ourselves on a daily basis - DON'T WASTE THE PRETTY!
All of us ladies at some point let men treat us less than what we deserve. I've been guilty of this and I've had enough.

In the recent months I've started doing a better job of setting up boundaries for myself. Before when I went out with a guy I might've let them get away with stuff and treat me poorly. I might've been willing to sleep with them because in my head I thought they might actually like me. Now, it's a different story, I need to know you're gonna stick around and if you're gonna treat me like crap, you're not worthy of spending time with me.

In one of my last dating experiences, I thought that this guy might actually be interested in me. He was coming out of a long term relationship and there had been a few rumours about him. Despite this, I thought he was a good guy and had good intentions. Then I started realizing that that he might be in for one thing. He'd send inappropriate texted messages. Now considering I never have seen him naked or vice versa I thought "what's this about?" Now if he were my boyfriend, I'd talk dirty to him till the cows come home, but the fact that we weren't and never even slept together I started to think that this guy was looking for his next conquest.
Now, I don't think this guy is a bad guy, I just think he's going through a phase and looking for what most guys do after a break up...nothing serious!

After that I beat myself up quite a bit. I wondered "will I ever find a guy that actually likes me? I even wondered if the reason he doesn't talk to me anymore is because I did NOT sleep with him...and if I did would he still be talking to me? I even beat myself up thinking wondering what I do when I meet people that gives them the idea that they can try to pull that behavior on me.


DON'T WASTE THE PRETTY!

I should not care if the reason that that guy doesn't talk to me anymore is because I wouldn't sleep with him. I'm not looking for Mr. 2 weeks. I'm looking for someone that wants to be around for awhile. Someone that actually cares about me not someone that cares about how I look naked.

I should not beat myself and worry about if I did the right thing or not. Because at the end of the day it appears that we're looking for 2 different things. He was looking for a good time and is sowing his oats, while I'm looking for someone to respect me and make a part of their life.

You see I worried about whether this guy liked me. I was wasting the pretty. Instead I should've said to myself, "It's his loss and I deserve better."

Over the years I can think of so many times I wasted the pretty. I wasted the pretty on worrying what I did wrong. I wasted the pretty on guys that didn't deserve me. I wasted the pretty on guys that aren't capable of giving me what I need and deserve. And I wasted the pretty on why it(love) hasn't happened yet.

So many of us are afraid of being alone that we stay in relationships we shouldn't or let people treat us less than what we deserve because we're afraid we won't find anything better. Instead we should know that if he doesn't respect you that you need to get out and find someone that does and deserves your pretty.


Here's to starting a new day of standing up for yourself and what you deserve. Here's to me not worrying why he didn't call or if he thinks I'm good enough, because I am. He was just too blind too see it. Here's to me not worrying about people that I shouldn't give them the time in my head.