Tuesday, August 26, 2008

WHEN DO YOU STOP CARING?

I don't have a ton of ex's. You can say that either as a good thing or a bad thing. One thing that I've noticed since being in Milwaukee as a completely single girl is that you run into people you date a lot. I haven't dated anyone too seriously since being here but the ones I have I see all the time.

The most recent break is still somewhat painful. I had kept in contact and remained friendly. We would continue to talk and hang out occasionally. I did still have a little feeling for that person. He would say things to me that I actually believed to be true. Come to find out he was "dating" or having a summer fling with someone the entire time. Whom may I add...is not even 1/4 the woman I am. Yeah I said it!!!

My friend recently broke up with her boyfriend. Even though she knew he was no good, she was still bummed. Although he was bad news...he still had good qualities that she liked. Kind of like my guy. Even though he played me, and was not a good person to me in the end, there were things about him I appreciated and missed.

It got me thinking...When do you stop caring? How much time needs to pass before you can run into that person and say..."Yeah, I feel nothing!" What needs to happen when you can see them with someone else and it won't bother you even just a bit? How much time passes til you can be in a bar or restaurant with your new boyfriend and not have to leave because they're there?

I hate to admit this but I know I've avoided places hoping I won't run into a certain group of people. It sucks!! I don't think I should stop doing what I like to do because I may see a certain person with their latest flavour of the week!

Even though I hate winter maybe it'll be good because then, the person I'm scared of running into will decide to hibernate at home and drink scotch on his couch with a paper towel in his right hand.

Monday, August 18, 2008

DOES EVERYONE SLEEP AROUND??

I'm starting to wonder if everyone sleeps around and if I'm one of the only people that hasn't gone buck wild after a divorce or breakup. I can think of both men and women that when a break up of some sort happens to them, they end up going off the deep end and sleep with anything that shows interest in them.

A girl I can think of totally went off the deep end when she had her divorce. This girl is obsessed with getting it on. Married, single, young, old, it doesn't matter. It's funny because, she is actually a pretty girl with a good head on her shoulders and has her stuff together. Yet, she loves the horizontal mambo, to the point where she makes horrible choices in men.

I actually have a couple ex's that kind of went off the deep end. One of them went from having a lack of desire to having a "F&#@ BUDDY" after we broke things off. He also "dated" any girl that he knew didn't have potential in the long run. All of the girls he was with were time fillers.

The other ex...honestly I don't what his deal is. It's partially a fear of commitment. The other parts I think are a combo of things. The fact that he's a little younger and still figuring things out. Maybe one part is the group of guys that he hangs out with. They are kind of playboys and like to have a good time. All I know is that since our breakup his not really the same guy that I thought was. Playing girls and having flings.

There is also a guy that I dated for about a month. When I was seeing him I wasn't the only girl he was seeing. He was trying to spread himself between 5 girls!! Yep 5!!! Needless to say, I was out! I think he took pride on how many he could juggle at a time.

Another reason why I'm writing this blog is because lately I've heard several stories about men and them fooling around on the significant others. One of my guy friends has a girlfriend yet on the weekend may hookup with an ex-girlfriend. Or the stories I'm hearing about guys cheating on their wives. All of those stories have got me scared to date anyone for fear that they'll pull the same.

A very good guy friend of mine was seeing a girl who he saw real potential in. Now, my friend while in his 20's was what one might call a "man whore". Now he is in his 30's and ready for a real relationship. They actually dated for over a month and never once slept together. He really liked her but was waiting for the moment. I found it amazing...and so did he...that he had that much restraint. He really cared about her.

I just wonder sometimes does anyone keep their legs crossed anymore? It doesn't matter your situation either. Married, single, ready for a relationship or wanting to be single and see what's out there. Are we all that selfish that we only think of ourselves and our needs versus the consequences or feelings of other people?

I will end with this...for every action or decision we make comes outcomes and consequences. Sometime the outcome is good. You might find someone you truly like. Sometimes it is bad. You might get a disease. You may get hurt....or you may hurt someone you care about.